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Monday, August 10, 2015

Just So You Know...You are Wanted, You are Liked

What seems like a hundred years ago I was having one of the first conversations with my now-husband who had cornered me at a party. It was only our second time meeting but I have forever remembered the conversation (and teased him for it). He was trying to ever so casually show his interest in me, which in my suave husbands style equated to him telling me every other sentence or so that "just so you know, I really like you." I still tease him about this to this day, but honestly... it worked. I answered his phone call and he got a date. And more honestly, it made me feel valued, special, and worthy... what we all long for really.
I don't know about you, but over the last few weeks my facebook newsfeed has been flooded with articles, videos and commentary about Planned Parenthood and abortion. (If you don't have all the pro-life friends I do that have been flooding your newsfeeds, this is the video that started it and a few more have followed.) I have watched and read many of them but I haven't said anything or shared anything yet. Partly because when I say something I want it to be the right thing, and partly because I want to be careful in what I say to not further hurt those who have already been hurt by the death of their child. But this week in particular I feel there is an important message that needs to be shared, so here I go:
One of the messages that I saw was from Abby Johnson who is a former employee of Planned Parenthood. She shared about a discussion on late term abortion:
"I went to a friend of mine and asked her what she thought of aborting babies so late...I had always been uncomfortable with late term abortion. She said, "Well, it's better to kill them before they are put in a dumpster." And that was how I then began to justify late term abortion in my mind..."better than in a dumpster."
Since leaving Planned Parenthood, that conversation has always haunted me...how easily I could justify something so heinous. I have since learned that if you have to justify something, then you probably shouldn't believe in it. Thank God for redemption and mercy."
 
The whole post was even more disturbing than that, but it cut to my heart that it is a very common way of thinking that there are so many children that are so un-wanted that they are better off dead. The timing of this is no accident. Tomorrow, we celebrate the first birthday for my son Samuel who we were blessed to adopt after years of praying for him. I have spent the entire year thanking God for his birth mother, who gave him the greatest gift of life and gave us the greatest gift of him. I realized as I read that quote "better than in a dumpster" that after years of trying to adopt I have been so immersed in the adoption world and surrounded by other families who have adopted, that maybe other people don't understand what I have come to know: EVERY BABY IS WANTED. Maybe you haven't met one of us, that understands the amazing gift that a child is because we can't produce one as easily or even by accident like so many can. Maybe you haven't shared a friends adoption page 50 times over a period of 5 years as they painfully wait to bring a child home. Maybe you haven't gotten to see that couples love for each other spill over to their child and that love spill into the community like I have. Maybe you haven't felt the incredible joy of finally getting that phone call you've been waiting for your entire life. And probably, if you still believe in abortion, you weren't there when my son's birth mom sweetly told him she loved him and handed him to me. You haven't seen my husbands smile as his boys snuggle in to his shoulder.

You haven't felt the days and years pass slowly as you pray with all your heart that God will give you a child. Maybe you didn't know that at any given time there are over ONE MILLION of us.
There are no un-wanted babies.
 

Please, if you are pregnant or ever become pregnant, hear my message as loud and clearly as I heard my husband that night at the party: Your child is wanted, and is loved. They will grow up feeling special, valued and worthy. I personally could put you in contact with multiple couples currently hoping to adopt as well as my husband and I.
I also challenge those of you reading this who want to save children, if we truly care about these children, we have to work harder to create a culture that values children instead of seeing them as a burdon. We have to care enough to not only be willing to adopt or help their parents, but WANT to. All children need to be wanted by someone. Sadly, I bet we all know a child who doesn't feel that way. We can change that. We can be the one person that makes them feel valued. It might be as simple as "just so you know, I like you" and it might just be all they need to hear.
I hope you know today that you are valued and loved by me and most of all by the King of the Universe. Prayers as you change the world, one child at a time.

 

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