The Reason Every Day is the Best

Oh Husband,
Tomorrow we celebrate 12 years. Its hard to believe it was that long ago that the "best day of my life" was finally happening. I remember the joy of the day so clearly, how I think I smiled the whole entire day, and I never believed I would be so happy ever in my lifetime. Sometimes it feels like yesterday, and sometimes, I think about the things we've been through together and it's hard to believe it's ONLY been 12 years. But today, as I'm thinking about you and the gift you've been to me, I just want to thank God for you. Of all the incredible blessings in my life, and I have been seriously spoiled by my Father God, you are the greatest blessing of all.
You have seen me at my worst and loved me anyway. You have walked with me through so many seasons of grief. You have held my hand, and held my body up as we have laid child after child in the ground. You have prayed over them when I could not utter the words. You kept a steady, even faith through every trial we have faced. You have been the voice of reason when I am being irrational and I know you want to be too. The number of hours or probably days worth of crying you have sat with me through I cannot count. You have always been the strong one, the one who holds all the burdens of our family on your shoulders. You balance the emotions of loss and foster care and worry and things being out of our control along with providing for our family. And I know that when you walk out the door, you go to take on the burdens of your friends and your customers and your customers who have long since become friends. I see you care so deeply about their families and their success and I don't know how you possibly have anything left to give them after our family demands so much of you, but you always give everyone all you have.
What I love the most, is that after everything we've been through the last 12 years, after everything that has been placed on your shoulders, you still walk through the door every day with a smile on your face, so happy to be home. You still can walk in to a house full of crying, fighting crabby children and an even crabbier wife, and completely change the atmosphere and have us all laughing and smiling in a matter of minutes. I love that after 12 years you still have the same mischievous look in your eyes and all it takes is one look to know you still love me like crazy. I cannot figure out why. But I'll take it. Because I never would believed this if you told me twelve years ago, but tonight when you walk in the door, I will love you even more than I did back then. It will bring me even more joy than the day of our wedding to be with you. It's such an honor to be married to you, to get to walk these hard roads with you and the joyful ones.
Last week, a song came on the radio, and Little Man was dancing, and decided to slink over and climb into your lap and lay his head on your shoulder, right as the words of the song sang "you're a good, good Father." I thanked God in that moment and every day that my children get to have the best father in the world. I thanked Him that they would know who He is because you are showing them what a fathers love is supposed to be. There are so many kids in the world who have no idea what the unconditional, constant, unchanging, forgiving, protective, wise, patient love of a father is and because of that they may never know or may struggle to understand the love of their heavenly Father. But not our kids. Not all the kids you are "dad" to that don't live here anymore. They are so blessed, because you are an incredible father, and we are so lucky to be your family.

You are a man of a million talents and its fun watching you and the things you can do. I can't understand how you seem to know or figure out how to fix or build just about anything from construction to mechanics to the kids toys. And I haven't yet heard anyone else say they know someone who has come home and built a 30 foot deck in one day by themselves, so maybe you're the only actual super-dad out there. And as much as I admire all of those things, most of all, it's when you bow your head before a meal and thank God or humbly ask for patience or forgiveness that I'm confident you're the greatest man I know.
These twelve years have been full of heartache and overfull of blessing as we welcomed more children in heaven than we can count, adopted 4, have 5 living under our roof right now (except for that one crazy month where there were 7!!), 4 that live under another roof but we love as our own and sometimes parent on the weekends, and others who have only stayed a few days. We've started a new business, purchased a farm, had 5,678 fights about money and who left their shoes in front of the door and who works too much and who should take out the garbage (FYI, you've forgotten the last 195 days). We've been handed children unexpectedly and we've had children taken unexpectedly. But everyday, every struggle, every joy, you have been there, and that has been the greatest blessing of all. No matter what happens the next twelve, the next fifty, I will be blessed because I get to live them out with you. And every day, everything we encounter, has been another opportunity to grow, and makes me love you even more. So tomorrow, 12 years later, I'm living out the best day of my life all over again. And I'll do it again next week. Thanks for making every day the best one yet (unless we're going to look at the farm books...then we're probably going to have a nice fight and not talk until morning.) Ok...even days we kindly and politely (right!?) discuss our farming business, those are the best days too. Love you!